Update and Questions

[ChristysMom]

Christy has been put on an anti arrymythia Atenolol 50MG. She is also still taking Digoxen. I am afraid she is doing cocaine on a regular basis her bf came into some money and that seemed to be the beginning. I think she knows she is in serious trouble. Does anyone know how this will affect her with her current problems. Her EF is 40-44 as of April 2004 and she is suppose to get another echo in three months. Her new heart doc is good but overworked and could not get to it any sooner.

[mikeyandBellesmommy]

Barb, I can't imagine Cocaine is good at ALL with a heart problem such as ours, I know I can not even take decongestants as they bother my heart and make it palpitate. I would suggest she get into a treatment program ASAP. She has two babies depending on her and cocaine itself can kill you let alone with a heart problem such as ours.

I know you had said she is bi polar and this disorder can make you much more prone to cocaine use. I really think Christy needs a treatment program to help her with her problems and she should certainly stay on her bipolar meds. Easier said than done I know. my friends sister is bipolar and when she goes off of her meds she tends to self medicate with cocaine and alcohol. She finally sought help when her her husband took her kids away.. I know it sounds drastic but maybe she needs to realize how how horribly her behaviour is effecting her family..

Personally if I was her heart DR I don't know how I would feel about a patient who seemed to be abusing herself such as Christy is. She really needs to see a DR who specializes in drug abuse and bipolar disorders and possibly fix that problem first and maybe when she is thinking more clearly her heart dr can truly help her. I think he could put her on a cocktail of meds but if she is using drugs how well are they going to work..

I hope I don't sound mean or rude I don't want this to come off that way..I know how messages written can sound harsh when that is not the intention.

I really hope Christy can get the help she needs for you and her children.. You love her so much and I really really hope she can get better..

I don't think I even answered you question, LOL!

Good luck I hope we see you around more often..

[SusanD]

Barb: I am SO sorry to read this about Christy. We have all followed her story through you for so long. Her heart is on the brink of recovering but you should know cocaine use puts her at SERIOUS risk for suddent death due to dysrhythmia's...especially with her EF being in the moderate category. It is working directly against the medications she is on to slow her heart. Who is taking care of her children ? My heart just breaks for you, her and those precious babies. Please update us.....we truly do care.

[ChristysMom]

I am sure Christy's doctor does not know about the use of drugs. I am speculating based on what I have seen over the past several months. I don't want that going down on paper if I am wrong. Christy has had substance abuse problems before and her problems go way back. I do think the antisocial and bipolar has alot to do with the way that she is. I don't understand and her mental health problems are much harder to deal with than physical problems. She has pretty much quit answering the telephone for me and has become very withdrawn. I supplement her bills and I am planning on letting her telephone get cut off (I did find out you can still dial 911 even if you do not have telephone service). I don't claim to understand her and to be honest I don't even try. It does however break my heart but she has been doing that for years. She has a good support network of family and even the girls grandparents are very good to her. I wonder if she realizes how lucky she is. I have never mentioned these problems on the board because no one likes to air dirty laundry :( I feel like I am in a no win situation. There is a possibility that she will be moving in with her grandmother and that will certinally help under the current circumstances. Thanks for the replies.....Barbara

[SerenaWelsh]

Hi, Barbara.
I know from my own experiences with a drug addicted relative who also has some serious mental problems (paranoid schitzophrenia, bipolar disorder, sociopath....) that you are exactly in a no-win situation. It seems that half the battle is realizing that.
No matter what you do to help support that person, it will be viewed as wrong, not enough, or manipulative. That doesn't mean we stop loving them. I guess it means we just grow thick skin and let their behavior just roll off our backs.
It seems harsh to tell them to take responsibility for their own lives. It's like telling a blind person to just see or a deaf person to just hear. A family member has tried alanon and narcanon to help cope with the addicted relative. Have you ever looked into these programs for yourself? They seem to have helped quite a bit...

[ChristysMom]

Thanks Serena, I can tell by your reply that you do know what its like. Its a sad situation I can tell you. Years ago when she was 14 I went to wake her up for school and she was gone...since she knew she was caught she decided to stay gone for a week. I was frantic and from there on out it was one episode after the other. The things that I experienced over the next years were horrible. She has a true love/hate relationship with me and I used to let her threats tear me apart. I know now that the silence will only last until she needs me again which usually doesn't take very long. Her father was killed when Christy was 3 and I know he had the same problems that she has, alot is pure genetics. I have talked with a therapist a few times and didn't find it very helpful but narcanon or alanon would probably be better. Thanks for your reply and I will keep you posted. Barbara